In keeping up with this weeks wedding theme I wanted to share some positives from my wedding. I know yesterday was a bit whiny but you know, you live and you learn. I hope you’re not sick of me yet because there’s a whole lot more where that came from. I have two very significant memories that I rank as my favorite.
The first being our vows; more specifically my husbands vows. For our catholic ceremony we usee the traditional vows of the church but for our beach wedding ceremony we wrote our own vows. Ahead of our wedding, Matt gave me this whole lecture about how I was not supposed to write better vows then him. He even told me I was not allowed to put poetry in it. (I’m a slam poet so it made sense.) So I spent a lot of time writing and rewriting and even after our wedding I wasn’t completely in love with what I wrote. Wait? I thought this was good memories though?! It is! My vows were not that good but they allowed Matt’s to really shine. His vows were all about how wherever we were together is home and how much us sharing this life together makes him whole. For our first anniversary he framed them. I read them sometimes when I am having a pretty shit day or when he farts and then pulls the covers over my head. A perk of this memory is when my mother heckled Matt for reading his vows off his cellphone and he exclaimed “who uses paper nowadays anyway?!” As I hold my vows. Written on paper.
The second being a song. For our catholic ceremony we got to pick the music. Since I volunteered in the church for many many years I knew everyone in charge of our wedding. Really it was the priest and the musician Michael. Michael helped us pick out the music which he song so beautifully day of. One song I picked specifically for our ceremony after using it for a couple years during confirmation. Amazed by Philips Craig and Dean is a simple song with a simple melody but it has always been so powerful to me in times of prayer. Sitting in the empty church after saying our vows and receiving communion (me not Matt), this is the song that played. I know that Matt regrets not inviting his family and friends to this ceremony. I regret listening to him and not pushing him to invite them. He felt that people would sort of brush it off like whats the point in going to St. Lucia if you’re getting married in Jersey?! But in that moment I truly felt like we started our journey as husband and wife. Just us two and God. In that moment I was amazed by the love our God had provided us and the love we were cultivating and sharing with the world. I will never forget the feeling of looking down over us during this moment. How incredibly sure I was that I was making the right decision. I still get that feeling every day when Matt comes home from work.
Sometimes weddings get crazy. They go overboard and get flashy. They turn dramatic and tearful. My wedding was all of that and so much more. What I hold on to are these small moments that bring me back down to center. Reminding me that love is the reason we are here today and everyday.