I want to share with you something that I’ve noticed in my life since getting married and moving out of reach of the people who I’ve always surrounded myself with. There is a lot less drama!
Another thing is people speak to me more now. People who never spoke to me before and people who didn’t have a vested interest in my life now have real conversations with me. Whether it be through Instagram or text or whatever; there’s a shift.
So what changed?
I stopped feeding the monsters under the bed. I stopped letting the negativity run my life and I try my hardest to live in the light.
One of my cousins, after visiting my house for the first time, sent me this really heartfelt message. He said he was happy being around me because I was so happy. He was proud of my lifestyle and it made him want to eat cleaner and live cleaner too. He said it was infectious and he couldn’t wait to come back. Messages like that really help on days where I question who really cares for me.
I have another cousin who has never been to my house. A couple of years ago, before I was even dating Matt, I would try everything in my power to spend more time with this person. I would take her out to eat, buy tickets for shows, invite her everywhere; anything and everything you could possibly think of. In return she would show up sometimes and leave early to hang out with her friends or use me as an alibi to go somewhere else so she didn’t get in trouble. It became toxic on my end. Eventually I stopped trying, I started dating Matt, we fell in love and I moved in with him in Astoria. This person never visited there or made the effort to hang out. I would get the “we should hang out more” text messages and guilt trips. Now I live in Long Island, and I’m married and its the same story. Only now I don’t get texts but she always gets an invitation.
The difference here is that I don’t let their negative pattern stop me from being happy anymore. Back then I would spend a lot of time trying to please that person and trying to get closer to them when it was very clear they didn’t care to be close to me. Now I keep living. They are always invited but I don’t let their absence ruin my day.
In life there will always be drama. There will always be people who try to blame you for their shortcomings.
Live in your own light. Be your own happiness. Eventually people will catch on. Until then the world is yours!